Jarmila Kročková

„Of course I was terribly thrilled, when the new president was elected. He was well respected abroad. Sadly not so much in our country. But as anyone he made mistakes. He was definitely the very best president we ever had. He was a classy gentleman, well educated, you could see he was an artist, so there was much artistic licence in his speech. Without any discussion, he was a respected person. Unfortunately more abroad than in here. Too many people were just not ready for such change here. Obviously I knew about him; I was in touch with the chartists, but just a little (…) A lot of tolerance has disappeared here. There is much evil and negativism amongst people. I believe that life is not all black and white, it is simply colourful. Even Havel was not black and white, he was a human being as any of us that is not flawless. But essentially he was worthy our admiration for he managed to hold the function. I thought very highly of Olga Havlová, his wife, who was very modest person, but also quite a spirited person with her sarcastic attitude. She was quite unrestrained, which with Havel... but it is hard to say how it got lost. Also he was in a certain environment, so a man can only hardly say, he should not have done this or he should have done that. I would never dare to judge, as I wasn’t in the same situation. Anyhow, he was an honest man and surely meant well. He tried to surround himself with people, who were quite decent... of course, not all the time he managed that...”

“Then the 1950s came, when the father was sentenced to fifteen years in prison for high-treason and I don’t know what else. At the time I think that three days after they arrested the father without him knowing anything; he left for Prague to a meeting and he never came back. Three days later the mother was also arrested. And from the stories I know it was terrible for her. She had no idea what happened to the father, didn’t have a clue what happened. They arrested her, took us too and somewhere on the way they separated us from mum. They took mum in one car and drove us in the other one, as the story goes. My brother ended up in a children shelter in Budišov, which is in Ostrava region. Back then I was not even three and half, as mum was arrested in January and I was born in November, so just over three. I was taken to Beskydy to secret police. I was an older couple. They renamed me to Jarmila Nevludová. Although my mum´s sister lived in Košice amd my father´s sister in Teplice with her husband, son and daughter, they were searching after us, what happened to us, there were no info provided at all. Mum was thirty six, when she was arrested. She was leaving as a beautiful black-haired woman and two years later, which she spent in custody, she was never tried, she came out as white as a feather. I never saw her black again. I only know it from photos. I also know from the telling that during those two years, when the processes were already on, they offered her several times to divorce her husband, so they´d let her go and see her children. And if she divorced him and renounced him, so everything can be as it used to be... I got to say that mum was brave and didn’t do it. And also from telling I know that secret police dictated her letters saying what I am doing and what does my brother and sent the letters to him (father). We know it, my brother and I that the letters existed. Mother was telling us about it that they did such thing, writing made up stories about us and actually she didn’t know anything about our whereabouts. That must have been crazy, I cannot even imagine that! But from the telling I know, that there was something alike, as they were applying a big psychologic pressure at him. They were making up constructions so that he´d confess... from the secret police they learnt a lot, or I don’t know from whom...”